Captain Kidder (played by Dan Hennessey) is almost as much of a stinker as BJ (although not nearly as literally). This is one pirate who should stick to lootin' and pillagin', 'cause his jokes are simply putrid. But nonetheless, you'll still find him doing stand-up in cheesy dives like the Last Resort Resort...it's kind of sad, really. However, no one can surpass Kidder in kidding. Not even little Ed, the skeletal parrot who cools it on his well-padded shoulder. Parody of Captain William Kidd He is also like Captain James Hook from the story of Peter Pan.
- Name: Captain Kidder
- Profile: Professional Pirate (Arr!) and stand-up comedian extraordinare!
- Status: Ghastly
- Catchphrase(s): "Ba dum-bum!"
- Identified by: The worst jokes in the Neitherworld